Posts Tagged ‘quote’

Articles

embrace it.

In Uncategorized on February 18, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , ,

i’m embracing attitude now  a days. just because i can. today i’ve had my standard pot of black coffee with breakfast. a half an hour ago i stepped into starbucks and ordered a venti americano, since no one’s stopping me.

i’m still rocking yoga pants & slippers to class. since i like to stay classy.

i go stir crazy in my apartment and always take the long way across campus. i tell myself that it’s okay not to do yoga everyday and i still get anxious when i don’t do it wednesdays and fridays. i tell myself that two days with mini walks won’t kill me or make me blow up like a balloon but my mind begs to differ.

i contemplate, analyze, and overthink. i think it’s okay that i’m on the verge of crazy. isn’t everyone?

i thought about giving up measuring for lent but i decided i didn’t want to put myself through the torment. especially since i never practice my catholic heritage.

i was just taken back to my early gymnastics days. i saw the logo of my club, a good looking man was carrying the duffle. i realized there was no way i could have said anything to him about it because i never moved past compulsory when i was there. and i realized i stopped practicing there seven years ago. i often forget the fact that i wasn’t content even then.

i live in the past, the way things used to be, the way i used to be, the way other’s used to be. everything changes. i’ve changed, they’ve changed, things changed. life never stops.

i’m idealistic, but i’m convinced i will never reach my ideals. i feel as though i have never reached my potential. but i have no idea what my potential is.

i forget that i am unique. but i also forget that i can relate to others.

i learned on tuesday that i am capable of painting my nails myself. sound strange? yes i believed if i painted my own nails they would look awful. so i always pay to have them done. i’m not bad at painting nails. it is calming. but i hate waiting for them to dry. it makes me antsy.

i cannot pinpoint my largest fear. sometimes i think i just afraid of life. i’m afraid of being hurt by anyone other than myself. i’m afraid of being alone.

i am glad that i don’t feel the need to push the way i eat onto other people. i’m glad i don’t constantly tell people how much better organic apples taste versus regular apples. i eat regular apples and i love them. hell my perfect apple would be grown on my own apple tree. i’m possessive.

i want to have dinner parties, complete with wine, fancy cheese, seven courses, & opera cream coffee with dessert. it will probably never happen. & i will compare all the dinner parties i go to, to this party i have created in my head, and it’s very likely nothing will ever live up to it.
i’m not lying when i say that when i went on a cruise i expected it to be like the titanic.

i feel the need to complicate simple things to challenge myself and ultimately fail.

but i’m trying to embrace my attitude. i can do anything. i can say anything. i can be anything. so can you.

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” — Buddha

Articles

subtle weekend

In Uncategorized on February 7, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , ,

happy sunday all! anyone else super hyped could care less about the super bowl? i’m hoping no one wins :)

thanks so much for weighing in on my roommate situation. i thought about going back down to school yesterday, but the snow prevented that, so i’m actually heading back down tomorrow morning. which means i have not yet talked to my roommate, and that a few days have passed so i am going to wait to see if she says anything about it before i jump down her throat.

as for the weekend, nothing new here, i chilled at home. my mom did paint my room while i was at school this week & i love it. its all grown up & sophisticated (wish i had my camera with me) — well my sister says the walls are the color of oatmeal, which only made me love it more.

oh i bought an acorn squash today—any tips on how to prepare it?? what’s your favorite way to enjoy acorn squash?

wish i had more to report on today, just lacking the inspiration.

i’ll leave you with the picture i’ve been using as my desktop background :)

weheartit.com

i’m now feeling my yoga urge coming on, so i’m going to indulge myself. && i’m loving the questions :)

“That you are here–that life exists and identity, That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” — Walt Whitman

Articles

silly thursday

In Uncategorized on January 28, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , ,

i think its clear i am suffering from blog layout indecision. no big.

so, it’s thursday and i don’t think i have anymore classes this week & i was the fool sitting in class waiting for it to start when it occurred to me to check the syllabus and see that class was cancelled for today and tomorrow. oops–it happens. now i’m just sitting in my apartment watching bobby flay grill some quail & figs, while he keeps explaining the fabulous-ness of it all.

speaking of figs, i did some unnecessary shopping yesterday. not complaining :)

i do not regret spending $8 on a hunk of soap. hello figs & leaves! i may regret that i impulsively bought lip balm at the register. they get me every time.

side note i’ve kind of been loving figs for a few weeks now. a month ago i thought i hated them.

a FIG! by the way my roommate thought it was cheesecake when she saw it in the bathroom...

you would not believe how good this stuff smells (actually you probably would believe it, haha). my friend thinks i’m going to end up eating it one day. i hope she’s wrong.

i also went to target, and its impossible to go in there and not buy anything so i didn’t even try to resist.

hot chili sauce. random, right? but it is delicious :)

& as you can see i’m trying to work with some natural lighting, since i’m a wee bit obsessed with my synergy photo.
synergy by the way is very delicious, it has a strong flavor & i can’t drink a whole one in one day, but it’s perfect for sipping on. i have plans to buy one once a week. i understand that’s a weird plan.

i tried something new this morning—> wake up yoga at 645am at the rec center. unfortunately i was pretty unbalanced…it was just me and one other person and i found it hard to focus on myself. my growling stomach was also distracting, silly me didn’t think i needed anything beforehand, definitely a mistake. when i left it was nice to see all the army boys working out :)

i also finished Madness, by Marya Hornbacher, the other night. i highly recommend it. i adore her writing and i can’t even begin to explain all she has been through in her life. i especially recommend it if you’ve read & enjoyed Wasted.

in a fit of major inspiration yesterday i took a risk. i took my spoon, dipped it into the cinnamon raisin swirl, scooped it up, and ate it. no measuring. i was a little surprised by the bit of anxiety it caused me, but the anxiousness passed and i went to bed. just like that. try it :) when was the last time you did something unexpected?

that’s about all of my updates, my dad’s picking me up tomorrow afternoon & my mom and i have plans to paint my bedroom this weekend. it’s going to be interesting.

LOVE.

“I relish my life. It is a life of which i am fiercely protective. I have wrested it back from madness, and madness cannot take it from me again. I will not throw it away. So what if it isn’t a normal life? It’s the one I have. It’s difficult, beautiful, painful, fully of laughter, passing strange. Whatever else it is, whatever it brings — it’s mine.”
Madness; Marya Hornbacher

Articles

screwing my head on straight

In Uncategorized on January 26, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , ,

you bloggies = the best. i say we just leave it at that.

sorry for being so dramatic loves, just had to get it out. i’m feeling better, i did have a nice yoga session & shower on sunday, along with a trip to whole foods with my grandma. & the structure of classes has been treating me pretty nicely.

today i had two tests, which i’m pretty sure went well, so i am currently doing a whole lot of nothing. i probably should be studying for my other test tomorrow,but i think that’s going to have to wait until after yoga & dinner. priorities. in my fit of nothing-ness i decided to stroll down to clifton natural foods. it sounded sketch to my mom. i disagree :)
i’m really glad i checked it out cause it has lots of bulk bins with grains & such so i don’t have to get such giant things all the time and i can cook at my leisure. & i got 2 pink lady apples. i’m excited :) oh & i got something new tooo–>

for the low low price of $2.99; i rationalized that i needed it cause they are more expensive at whole foods. ha

i haven’t tried it yet, but i called my mom to tell her about it (okay just realized how weird that is & i must apologize for my nail polish in recent pictures, my mom asked if i’d ever heard of nail polish remover) and she asked if i just seek out the strangest things there are…and i think she may be right, but that’s the fun right?? actually at the moment i’m currently snacking on kefir, pistachios, & raisins. pretty delicious if you ask me.

oh and today i met with my new therapist. first things first, she said “gotcha” a lot, which really irked me (so does the word irk). other than that she seemed nice, quiet. it was a lot of introductions and stuff cause she’s not the same woman i had my initial interview with. she gave me a card for a nutritionist i’m supposed to call as well. && thinking about it, i am going to try to stop calorie counting on my own right now. i have an exchange meal plan, so i think i’m going to go back to working with this & see how i feel.

all and all the past 2 days have been about getting my bearings together after this weekend & not going to lie, i already have plans to go home friday. i really cannot thank you guys enough for the endless support.

“I have discovered in life that there are ways of getting almost anywhere you want to go, if you really want to go.” — Langston Hughes

what do you guys think? can you really get what you want by truly wanting it? do people get stuck because they don’t actually want to move on? is it enough to just want something?

Articles

realizing yoga

In Uncategorized on January 22, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , , , , ,

thanks for the warm welcome back my beautiful bloggies. & ps (as i’m sure you all know) miss maggie is having the most fabulous of giveaways :) i’m hoping to recreate one of her breakfasts on saturday!

today was quite the useless day. however i did get a few things done:

  • bought the replacement ID
  • got my bearcat cash put back on it
  • hopefully got insurance figured out
  • tried the ashtanga class

&& that’s about it. more on the ashtanga yoga class–it was meh. i was as impressed with the teacher as i was on tuesday, i don’t know maybe i’m just a yoga snob. i’m thinking next thursday i’m trying out “yoga tricks” ha that should be interesting fun! maybe on wednesday i’ll check out “yoga chill

but you know what this class did get me thinking; i was getting down on myself for it not being that good of a practice (oh yeah i definitely had to pee the whole time–not a good time), but i continued to think and i realized that i do yoga. i could even venture to call myself a little yogini. hello i practice nearly everyday. yoga is a part of my life. and with that i realized not every practice has to be the ‘best’, i need to welcome more mentally challenging practices rather than physically challenging. so i am going to focus on truly setting intentions for my time on the mat, the first of which—to release judgement & hostility. its going to take a lot of practice, but most important things do.

now, i know you are all dying to find out what weekend may have in store for me ;)
tomorrow (friday)–no plans at the moment, eek.
saturday–lunch with a sorority [yep i’m thinking about informal rush…ah], maybe drinking hanging out with some friends
sunday–hopefully going to whole foods with my grandma (as in i haven’t called her yet to ask) **side note on whole foods, i went this weekend & could hardly handle it, i had so many coupons, i just didn’t know what to do with myself. that being said i organized my coupons & made a list last night. ha

so yes i have some plans, nothing is definite. that’s what scares me. everything could fall through. but i have to remember that college kids really don’t plan all that much. most tend to fly by the seat of their pants, and they like it that way.

oh and i have a therapist now. wow. yep, my next appointment is tuesday. you best believe you’ll be hearing about it.

now i think i’m off to bed. i’m probably going to sing “rain, rain go away, come again another day…”

innocence. sometimes i think i'm still this little girl & that i will never grow up.

“It is never too late to have a happy childhood”—Tom Robbins

Articles

refreshing

In Uncategorized on January 20, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , , , ,

i’m back loves. i love blogging. and i love all of you. thank you so much for being here for me. your kind warm words mean the world to me. && please know i have been reading, i’ve refrained from commenting but i couldn’t stop myself from reading, i like you all too much.

so what have i been doing for the past week? well, i’m not really sure. i’ve been doing school, i went home for the long weekend, and now i’m back to doing school. not all that much out of the ordinary. oh wait…i went to counseling yesterday afternoon.

yes counseling–i think i was honest. i told her about how i just feel uncomfortable, panicked, & still obsessed. i don’t know what’s going to happen next, they are going to call me within the week. she was nice, and will likely be the person i talk to. she also said they started a new protocol that has patients with eating issues work with a nutritionist and physician along with the therapist.

i’ve also gone to 2 yoga classes at the rec center. i’m really happy with them, over winter break i was looking for an actual studio to go to because i didn’t think the rec center classes would be that good. i was wrong, sure i’ve never tried a real studio so maybe i’m missing something, but these classes have been good. one day i hope to belong to a studio, but its just not in the cards at the moment.
yesterday we did splits :) i’m so surprised i could do them! & in savasana the instructor even gave us a little massage, pure bliss. i’m really hoping to make some friends in the classes.

as for the blog, i’ve been thinking about what kind of direction i want it to go in. if i want it to have a direction at all. honestly, i haven’t figured anything out. so i’m going to stick with going with the flow of it for now. but there may be some changes in the future ;) something FRESH.

back to me going home lots. i’m not sure what to think of it. i like being home, i like being around my family, i like the safety. but i also know that i’m using it as a crutch, so i don’t have to go out or hang out with new people. sure my social life is more active now than it was at indiana, i actually have chances to do things; now i’m just choosing not to. well, not for everything, but somethings—a basketball game over the weekend, a party on sunday, a basketball game tonight. i know this is how things start.
i have a goal to stay down here this whole weekend. unfortunately, thinking about it makes me anxious.

as for tonight i think i’m just going to take it easy…some yoga, whatever the wednesday shows are + homework. i also have to call my health insurance tomorrow, ew. & i lost my ID today, so i have to buy another one tomorrow. typical.

weheartit.com

kurt: every word is true.

Articles

weekend wrap-up

In Uncategorized on January 10, 2010 by Emily (https://funnyemily.wordpress.com) Tagged: , , , ,

happy sunday lovies. hope everyone had lovely weekends :) by the way it is 3 degrees right now.

what did i do? mini recap–well friday after class i got a ride home, went to the grocery store by myself (which i haven’t done in ages and i ended up being there for an hour and a half, gahh), didn’t measure my hummus or cream cheese, realized i’m orange again {my mom thinks i should lay off the carrots}!, fell asleep on the couch watching gran torinio. saturday my dad brought me back down to school, cause my friend was having a little party so i could meet some of her friends. now its sunday morning and i’m trying to figure out what i want to do with my day.

more on yesterday–>i treadmilled yesterday, probably the first time since july or august. there’s like a mini fitness center for my apartment complex so i thought i would check it out, cause i didn’t really want to walk all the way to the campus rec center. so how did it go? first off i felt like i was in a hotel, ha it’s tiny. i tried to read my accounting, but i bounce a lot while i walk so i just kind of skimmed. & yes i walked, i ran a little bit (like a total of 2 1/2 minutes). honestly i don’t know how i feel about it, i don’t exactly have the best relationship with exercise…i know its necessary, but i also feel like i can never do enough. i always find myself disappointed in my efforts. but i do have an urge to check out the campus rec center today…what to do what to do…
how do you handle exercise?

i also grabbed dinner with my friend last night, we went to potbelly’s, which was a first time for me. what’s great is that it wasn’t the end of the world. i got a sandwich and veggie soup and it was good :)

on the the little party–i had a good time! a first right?? it was nice cause there were only like 6 of us and we were just hanging out…& my friend loves wine so i didn’t have to refuse beer once, ha i even played some wine pong :) it was so nice that it was low key, and even though i was pretty much just meeting these people i felt fine about it. get this one of the girls actually goes to the culinary institute in new york! so cool!

that’s about all that’s going on over here, nothing too big of a deal. i do have some food finds :)

heart thrives!! they sell them in our quick marts :) i'm in love

oh and friday when i was at the grocery store for a million hours i grabbed something totally uncharacteristic. & i can’t wait to try it!

real candy! i had to get it, i never see the dark chocolate ones anywhere; totally an impulse buy only $0.50

to be honest i’m a bit weary about the reece’s, but there is no way i’m throwing it a way. i will take the step forward.

my plans for the day:

  • some laundry
  • textbook reading & homework
  • call and try to get a job
  • shower

exciting stuff right?? by the way i changed my email again. i know, i know –> emilyfindsfunny@gmail.com :)

ps–the gorgeous katie is having a chobani giveaway!!

“I have discovered in life that there are ways of getting almost anywhere you want to go, if you really want to go.” — Langston Hughes

i think this quote has a lot to do with recovery. we all know it’s possible and that we can all do it, we just have to really want it. we can’t pretend we want it, we can’t half want it, we have to really want it.